Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Rainy day facts

Today, in honor of our first full rainy day of the school year, I give you a list of facts:

FACT #1: My family is very good at eliminating flies. But we don't use fly swatters. We prefer the bare hand approach. As soon as the pesky critters have outworn their welcome, we just reach up, grab 'em, and then throw 'em away.

Once, my dad discreetly caught a fly while he was preaching a sermon. He continued to preach as the fly tried to squirm its way out of his hand before he finally confessed to the congregation, "I've just caught a fly and don't know what to do with it."

Fly catching is our Jackson family super power.

Now you understand why none of us have managed to eliminate crime or defeat masked archenemies.

FACT #2: When I was in college, my roomies and I liked to take late night trips to the grocery store to get candy, ice cream, and best of all, frozen yogurt, to satisfy our sweet cravings.

The sweet cravings runs started with these girls, freshman year of college

We had loads of fun together. This was after racing boats in the streets-turned-rivers on a rainy day.
Over the years, we added more roommates, and therefore more members to our sweet cravings runs. Sorry for the spots on this Halloween costume photo.

We eventually got so into our dessert runs that we decided to pinpoint the best frozen yogurt store in the area. Naturally, I developed this rubric to aid our assessment. Notice column #3 in the row assessing service: "[employee] smiles with mouth, eyes and heart." We were seeer.i.ous. (Click on the photo for a bigger picture)

Since college, however, something has gone terribly awry with my cravings. Last night I left my cozy bungalow and ventured into the rain to the grocery store because my cravings were something fierce. But instead of filling my cart with ice cream, I desperately needed . . . carrots. CARROTS, people. I'm guessing there's some sort of kink in the tubes that carry my cravings from my stomach to my brain.

FACT #3: I have a female friend who lives alone. Naturally, she sleeps with a butcher knife under her pillow. Because: robbers. Recently, her cleaning lady was stripping her bed when she discovered the knife. Without blinking an eye she carried it into the kitchen and set it in the sink so it could be washed.

Bless the cleaning woman who doesn't bat an eye when she finds a butcher knife under a pillow. 

FACT #4: There is a perfect footprint on the top of my piano. Sherlock Holmes would have a hayday with this footprint, it's so beautiful. It would probably go in his Footprint Hall of Fame. It may even receive the place of honor in his Footprint Hall of Fame.
I wonder what he'd deduce from the footprint and surrounding clues? Maybe he'd discover that a Christmas elf crept in the window above the piano in the middle of the night in order to eat some of my Christmas fudge? Or maybe he'd discover a friend of mine decided to climb up on the piano and jump from it onto my couch when I was in the bathroom? Or maybe he wouldn't be able to figure it out at all. Because a footprint on top of the piano is pretty mysterious.

FACT #5: It's raining cats and dogs here. I hear it's supposed to rain five inches today. This is great news because we've been experiencing a drought here for a few years. However, it is not great news when you are wearing leather shoes and have to ford the lake that is the parking lot. Oh California, you could use some help in the drainage department.

FACT #6: My students and I did a "dance of magic" today. Outside. In the rain. It suddenly made the day, well, magical.

I hope your day has been sprinkled with curious, silly and funny facts, friends.



© by scj

No comments:

Post a Comment